Mental parasites are negative emotional experiences, destructive thoughts, fears, anxieties, suffering and hatred that rob us of the joy of life. And sometimes we don’t even realise that something is wrong, accepting this condition as normal. Let’s look at the easiest ways to get rid of mental parasites and self-help to replenish life resources.
The trend of mental health care is only just gaining momentum. We are becoming increasingly aware that mental parasites are having a devastating effect on our lives. So what can we do to feel better about ourselves? We propose a two-block system: getting rid of mental parasites and creating an inner resource.
HOW TO BE SUSPECTED
1. Acknowledge the problem
Monitor your emotional reactions and attitudes through questions:
- “How am I feeling?”
- “What and when is particularly affecting my well-being?”
- “When do I let go?”
- “After what events or actions do I feel unwell?”
- “After which people do I feel empty or full?”
In this way, instead of letting thoughts and events take over your state, “winding up” what hasn’t happened, you deal with real and “inflated” problems.
2. Stop feeding the parasites
Give up habitual patterns of behaviour, stop yourself at the first reactions, consciously change your thoughts and don’t unravel the problems further.
3. Write out all your thoughts
From “What to write in general?” to “I’m tired of thinking about…”, “It bothers me…”, “What can I do to…?”, “What else can help?”. Freerating techniques are quite effective in releasing thinking from overload and structuring internal information flows.
4. Minimise anxiety, worry and worry
Use relaxation techniques yourself or start working with a professional psychologist. Turn problems into tasks by prescribing a solution plan to stop de-energising your body.
5. Stop getting involved in arguments and proving the truth
Realise that everyone is entitled to an individual path, mistakes and achievements. And in each moment, he/she makes the best decision possible.
6. Take more walks
Be consciously involved in what’s going on: feel every step, the wind blowing on your skin, hair, breathing in and out of cool/warm air, listen to sounds, observe what’s going on (what people are around, what trees, bushes, buildings, clouds…).
7. Direct your attention to your body
Here’s what will help to do this:
- sport – any physical activity can help shift focus away from negative thoughts;
- meditation as a tool for getting back into the body and visualising through immersion in a desired sensory experience;
- Sleep, nutrition and daily routines as natural support at the level of physical processes.
8. Create internal supports
Get to know yourself better by asking questions: “What do I love?”, “What makes me happy?”, “What is especially valuable to me that is unacceptable…”.
Instead of being angry at the unfairness of other people, events and life in general, look at challenges as a resource that is actually a point of growth. Once you’ve pulled yourself out of the minus, having cleared your inner space of destructiveness, start filling yourself up with new resources. It all depends on your preferences: it could be spending time with family, children, friends, baking cakes, travelling, shopping, a spa.
There are generally two types of resources:
- external – housing, clothing, accessories, friends, surroundings, activities, achievements;
- Internal – values, condition, skills, personal qualities, supports, energy.
HOW TO DRAW RESOURCES FROM WITHIN
1. Give yourself time to be quiet, bored and inactive
Everyone needs to reset, to ‘digest’ what’s going on, to slow down – especially when there’s all sorts of noise around. Allow yourself to do nothing for a few hours or days, not to be distracted by worries, problems, phone, children… Time is the most precious resource of the modern world and it is absolutely free.
2. Assign yourself qualities and skills
Look at yourself as if through a security camera. Ask yourself questions:
- “How much is this person already able to do?”
- “How many things has he gone through?”
- “How has he done with everything?”
- “What is he or she able to do (cook, make friends, listen, drive a car, draw dance, write texts, take pictures…)?”
Write out 30-50 real skills, even if they seem elementary. Take a look at them. You will be surprised at how many of your talents you underestimate and perceive as the norm.
3. Think back to specific accomplishments.
For example, you have completed a university degree, completed a course, mastered an activity, achieved results in an activity/sport. Ask yourself: “What are the strong qualities that helped you come to this?” Write them out. Reflect on where else you could apply these qualities, what could be strengthened.
4. Realise the dynamics of life
If you look back and remember what you wanted 10 to 15 years ago and compare that with how you live your life now, would you say most of your desires have come true? If yes, then “plant” the thought in your head, “My dreams are coming true!” Keep going towards your goals, making sure you enjoy the process along the way.
After answering the questions, you should already have a feeling: “Wow, what a great person I am! How much I already have! How much I can do!” This will be the first step in filling the body with resources through mindfulness work.
5. Focus on the Future
Write down in detail your desired day in three years:
- where and with whom you wake up,
- what morning rituals you use,
- What grooming products you see in your bathroom,
- How you enjoy the warm water that runs over your body in the shower,
- How you wipe your body with a good quality fresh towel,
- what your wardrobe looks like,
- what you wear today,
- what you’re eating for breakfast,
- what schedule you have planned in your diary,
- how you live and end the day,
- how you go to sleep.
The more details in your essay that create new sensory experiences, the better.
6. Set a goal
Based on what you have seen in three years, decompose the goal into small steps and start implementing them day by day, step by step, taking care of your state every day.