Life can be pretty complicated, and some of us even manage to complicate it all by ourselves. We sometimes bring the habit of tripping ourselves up from home, while at other times we acquire it through our experiences with the world. Many of us have our own instructions for unhappiness, with which we complicate our lives. My advice to you is to recognize your own instructions, write them down, crumple them up, and throw them away. To give you some inspiration on what not to do, I have provided a list of ways you can make your life more difficult than necessary, along with some suggestions on why not to do them. And if you’ve already completed your instructions for unhappiness, we recommend moving on to the instructions for happiness.
1.Look for malicious intent where there is none
The salesperson was trying to deceive you, people deliberately get in your way, and the news reports are written specifically to make you angry. In one in a million cases, this may actually be true. However, in most life situations, your projections are likely to be the reason behind it. You project your own feelings onto other people, attribute intent to them, and suddenly, without even realizing it, the whole world is against you. What did you do to anyone?
What happens around us often fills us with different emotions. However, we should not forget that they are only ours. Although sadness or anger are not among the most pleasant emotions, you will certainly do more for yourself and your surroundings if you learn to process them. Emotional intelligence is directly related to experienced happiness and mental health.
2.Be the main (and most important) character of your life
The camera is rolling, slate, action! You enter the scene and the whole plot revolves around you. Even negative characters come in who want to prevent your movie from having a happy ending.
But the world has 7 billion characters and the plot simply doesn’t revolve around you. Therefore, try to turn to a person who is close to you and for a moment look at “the movie of their life”. A moment of listening will enrich you with a new perspective and help the person who needs it.
3.Always expect the worst
No matter what happens, the apocalypse is around the corner. In life, you have confirmed that anything that can go wrong will go wrong. Therefore, you remain alert and above all, wait for every slightest hint of an impending catastrophe.
Negativity only breeds more negativity. Besides closing yourself off from everything good that’s happening around you, your pessimism can easily infect those around you. Instead, try to smile (even for no reason). Optimism breeds more optimism, which will come back to you.
4.Increase and/or don’t communicate your expectations
Why doesn’t your friend call you when you’re lonely? Why doesn’t anyone appreciate you at work? Why don’t people show you more respect?
These questions sound like a textbook recipe for unhappiness. Your surroundings may not know anything about your expectations. Therefore, let your friend know that you miss them when you’re not together, appreciate your colleagues’ work (they’ll likely return the compliment), and manage your expectations towards those around you. Less is sometimes more, and that applies doubly to expectations.
5.Wait for a sign
And wait a long time. Don’t move from where you are until you feel that the right moment has come.
You might lose out on beautiful kisses, good jobs, or a nice new apartment. Either way, you’ll also lose time, which is limited in your life. It’s nice when a “sign from above” comes, but often you are the sign yourself. Don’t wait until the universe tells you that you can be happy. Make your own happiness.
6.Don’t take risks
If you take a risk, you risk a loss, and you definitely cannot afford that. You have to be careful not to lose what you already have.
Facing risks is not pleasant, and neither is facing losses. However, living your life in gray mediocrity is a wasted chance. If you take a lot of risks, it certainly won’t always turn out well. On the other hand, you will gain more by taking risks than if you didn’t take any at all.
7.Compare your life to others
Whether it’s about happiness, money, or popularity, there will always be someone who has more than you. Of course, not everyone deserves it. But who deserves it? You do. Only you.
Don’t measure your happiness against someone else’s. First of all, your perception can be very distorted. The truth may be that the people we envy also envy us. However, what is much more important is not what others have. Envy is the antithesis of gratitude. It makes your life unhappy because no matter what happens in it, someone else is always the criterion of your happiness.
8.Let yourself be robbed of time
Watch your 12th favorite series again. Curse the delay while waiting at the bus stop. Explain everything to everyone until they fully understand you.
The time you have in life is limited. If you let others steal your time, you lose opportunities to work on your happiness. Those moments that seem empty call for fulfillment. Therefore, fill them with something meaningful.
9.Do not forgive and do not forget
Do everything to never get hurt. Be cautious with people, most of them only want to deceive you anyway.
Do not forgive and forget. Forgiving, but not forgetting. These are two combinations of words that have no power other than to bring you unhappiness. If you forgive, try to forget for your own good. The best way is to remain silent about the painful situation until death. Note that “forgetting” does not mean remaining a naive fool who gets burned a hundred times by the same thing. Learn from your injury, but do not let it take away your freedom. Do not allow it to continue hurting you for years after it happened. Do everything to make yourself stronger. In this case, you will remain poorer in memory, but stronger.
10.Do not give anything for free
Everything you have earned in life is yours and yours alone! Let no one dare to touch it!
With such a life attitude, you may remain rich on the outside, but completely poor inside. Giving can make you happy. It sounds paradoxical, but the more you get used to giving to others, sending money to charity, or supporting the weaker, the happier you become.
Therefore, do not hesitate and start turning your life towards happiness today. And you can share your own recipe for happiness (or unhappiness) in the comments.