Today, to get to know a person better, it is enough to study their social networks. When making a new acquaintance, the first thing we do is find his or her profiles and scrutinise the information: photos, common acquaintances, subscriptions. The account is our gift wrapping, an improved version, shown in the most favourable angle. But what about the flaws?
TYPES
Experienced psychologists have long since unravelled our masks and exposed the real us – the ones with wrinkles, fears and complexes. Having studied hundreds of profiles, they have identified several types of social networking behaviour, by which you can determine who is in front of you.
1. Secretive
As a rule, such a user has a closed profile. Moreover, he does not even spoil his friends with information about himself.
The account has only a couple of photos, a few “checks” from a year and a half ago, and a couple of subscriptions
“This is a typical introvert,” explains family psychologist Yulia Tokarskaya. – Perhaps, such a person tried to be in the trend, for which he started a social network account, but everything was limited to that. It is difficult for him to flaunt his life and share information about himself. Hidden type of behaviour may indicate that the user is experiencing emotional difficulties. The darkest variant is depression, when a person tries not to communicate with the outside world at all.
2. Sharing
The account of such a user resembles a chronicle of the instant monitoring service of the entire Internet.
On the page, he shares everything indiscriminately: recipes, news, pictures
Such a user is trying to please everyone at once,” says the psychologist. – He does not have his own image, style, he is a “hodgepodge”. As a rule, such a person lives by the principle of “copying”, does not become a pioneer and a source of interesting ideas. He may have hidden talents, but he does not consider them as such or is even ashamed of them.
3. Bragging
If you see an account in which a photo from the Maldives is replaced by a shot of a sunset over Tower Bridge, don’t rush to envy. This vita is not always dolce.
Most likely, you are not an avid traveller and a sybarite, but a lonely man who is afraid to reveal his sadness in front of others
“Look how interesting and varied my life is!” – shouts every photo on the wall of such a user. However, often behind all this there is a deeply unhappy person. The variety of places and events may indicate that it is hard for him to be alone with himself, and he puts on the mask of an always happy person. It is important for him to know that his life serves as an example to someone: this is how he gets rid of the feeling of meaninglessness.
4. Outspoken
The statuses of such users show how their moods change, literally by the minute.
He elaborates on this, complementing the posts with statuses like “puzzled,” “elated,” “happy,” and so on
“When a person is excessively open to the world, he shares emotions with everyone all the time. He can publish even the most intimate moments, such as a photo of him cuddled up with his partner in bed,” says the psychologist. – This is his way of showing that he is “his own”. Most likely, this person was once rejected by society or is simply afraid of it and tries to please everyone so that he will not be rejected”.
5. Sexy
This person – whether male or female – knows how to show off themselves and especially their body.
Polishing this user’s page, you can see him in a variety of angles, and in most of the pictures he will be semi-naked
“If we talk about the desire to impress, sexuality is always a 100 per cent hit,” explains the psychologist. – By posting photos of his body, the author expects encouragement and watches the number of likes. He just doesn’t know how else to earn them. This behaviour is based on low self-esteem and lack of self-confidence. It also shows that the person is at a basic level of development, when the system of values is dominated by physiological needs”.
6. Athletic
In his profile you will see a perfect sporty body in the best angles. And we are not talking about professional athletes, for whom sport is the meaning of life, but about ordinary people who are obsessed with their bodies.
If a person has an adequate image of his body, he is quite satisfied with it. If he does not accept his body, it quickly becomes a problem
“Such a person will continually transform themselves: plastic surgery, constant dieting, and sports will come into play. People with a distorted body image often have difficulties in their sex life and are generally unhappy,” says Julia Tokarskaya.
7. Master of selfies
Wherever such a user finds himself, he is sure to take a picture of himself. There is a single expression frozen on his face.
There is a sense of photomontage, as if the same portrait had been pasted into different frames
“If it were only narcissism! Alas, it is far from it. A large number of selfies in the profile speaks of extremely low self-esteem of the user. He tries time after time to convince himself that he is really beautiful. He doesn’t believe, appreciate or love himself, which is why he takes a photo every 15 minutes. This is one of the manifestations of narcissism, which is always based on extremely low self-esteem.”
8. Caring
Only parents and grandparents can look at hundreds of photos of the same child with interest.
So why do some mums constantly post photos of their children?
“Some women flaunt the ideal image of motherhood,” explains eespert. – “They unconsciously need it because they themselves don’t believe they are good enough for their child and need ‘social stroking’.” With their photos, they try to convince themselves and others that they are doing the right thing. It often turns into a “Who is the best mother?” competition. And this is not at all about the happiness of motherhood.
MOTIV
At the heart of many users’ “show-offs” on social networks is their low self-esteem.
Such people become addicted to social networks, do not enjoy the moment, but rush to demonstrate their achievements to others to get approval
These users need to constantly receive confirmation of their value from the outside, every comment is important to them, because it is from the opinions of others that their self-image is formed. Social networks become a way to make an impression, and this goal replaces the more important goal of becoming someone. Not for others, but for themselves.
TIP
Recognise yourself in one of the descriptions? Don’t despair: these characteristics are common to all of us to one degree or another. And if you notice a clear “kink” in yourself, any problem can be solved. Even recognising the problem is half the solution.